Scene at any Golden Corral buffet restaurant.
Golden Corral employee: "Sorry, it's only one per customer."
White Trash Customer: "Yeah, we're gonna need about 10."
I'm the blog post Nick saved for a rainy day.
Hi.
Now that I'm here lemme tell you a little about what's been going on. Well, first off the weather has been pretty nice for awhile. Me and the other rainy day blog posts have just been hanging out talking about blog topics and other stuff while soaking up the sun. You should see our killer tans.
Boy, it's really raining out, huh.
That fact is good for ME because I'm the blog post Nick saved for a rainy day. I've just been hanging out waiting for a chance to grace the pages of Nick's blog and so today's the day. Nice!
One day we were all sitting around in the sun shooting the shit about what we were gonna talk about when we came out when we noticed some clouds. We got all excited and one of us even started panicking because she wasn't totally ready to come out yet. Luckily for her, the clouds dissipated and she had a little more time to gather her thoughts. The rest of us were sad, though, because we just wanna come out already.
Anyway, I'm happy to be here and thanks for reading me! I've enjoyed chatting with you and let's not wait so long to catch up next time. Have a great rainy day and don't be a stranger!
Peace.
The Buster Posey commercial made me laugh
Scene: Woman having baby.
Buster taps his mitt and is like "Let's do this!"
Buster Posey (catcher for the San Francisco Giants) "busts" into the room. (Don't pardon the pun.)
The expectant hottie is like "you're not my doctor".
Proud about-to-be-a-father is like "Buster Posey!" (all star-struck.)
Buster is like "C'mon, I'm kinda like your doctor. I have gloves."
Expectant hottie is like "No!"
Buster is like "Are we gonna do this or what?!?"
Hubby is like "Honey, you're embarrassing me in front of Buster Posey."
A quick story about influence you don't know you have..
Hi. How are you?
Excellent! I knew you were doing well!
So I recently installed Windows 10 on a couple of machines. My installs went without issue which I was happy about. I assumed they'd go well and sometimes that's half the battle. In life, if you don't assume things are going to go your way then they won't. :-)
At the end of the install process, Microsoft asked me to report any issues and/or suggestions I may have to make the install process better.
I feel like most people (including myself) just skip over these types of inquiries unless there was some sort of major problem. As a society we love to bitch so obviously we're going to take time to do THAT if we run into trouble. But if the install went smoothly we'll generally just fly past that and go on about our day.
I decided to really think about if there was anything that I could tell them and there was one thing.
Before upgrading when I would reboot the OS would remember if I had my laptop's touch pad turned on or off. After upgrading it no longer remembered this setting, so each time I restarted I had to turn the touch pad off again (I prefer using a mouse.) It's a minor deal but it's a deal.
So I explained this to Microsoft not thinking they'd actually respond.
But guess what happened? Today I got a Windows Update that solved the problem.
Nice!
So the lesson is that whether you believe you have influence in the world or not, you ultimately do. And when you exercise said influence you improve the entire world.
And that's pretty badass.
My putting a packet of Splenda into a bottle of Coke Zero one-time experiment..
So I bought some Coke Zeroes by accident for my roommate because I thought he liked them but I got him mixed up with another friend. So now I got a bunch of these Coke Zeroes and I don't like Coke Zero. They call it Coke ZERO for a reason. Because that's what its worth. Also because that's how much taste it has.
But I digress.
I decided to try an experiment in an attempt to somehow salvage these Coke Zeroes and turn them into maybe at least Coke Ones.
I thought maybe the reason they taste so disgusting is because they don't have sugar. So if you add sugar maybe that will help.
But of course real sugar is not sweet enough so I opted for Splenda.
What happened next was kind of exciting. I'm glad I was near a sink. When I dumped the Splenda packet into the Coke Zero it immediately fizzed up and out of the bottle. I don't know exactly how much of the drink fizzed out of the bottle but it was a decent amount.
But that's not the coolest part. Once it was done what was left was actually halfway drinkable.
It's like all the bad taste fizzed out and left something closer to Coke 100 (or whatever regular Coke would be called if it were assigned a number. btw, the number they assigned to Coke Zero is spot on.)
Unfortunately even though the Splenda made the Coke Zero better it by no means got it close to regular Coke.
So bottom line, I don't recommend trying this experiment yourself. A better solution is just giving your disgusting carbonated beverages you bought by accident and not really worth of the Coke name to someone who actually likes them and not judge that person for having extremely questionable taste in soda. Everybody is different.
Peace and happy drinking of whatever carbonated beverages you find delightful!
Shoot first, ask questions later. It's about taking action. Asking "how" and not "why" (#blog inspired by @andrew_forrest)
July 12, 2015
(inspired by @andrew_forrest, pastor @MungerPlace church, Dallas.)
Everyone has heard the old mantra "shoot first, ask questions later." It's funny but God forbid we're ever put in a real life situation where we're forced to make this choice.
If you don't take the saying literally, however, and more as a metaphor for a way to live life, it can serve you well.
You see, in life we tend to ask too many questions when we should just be taking action. In other words, maybe we shouldn't be so concerned about why we should be doing certain things we know are good for us and/or society as a whole and more concerned about how we can go about doing them.
It's good to be curious but at some point the questions have to stop and the action has to start.
Sometimes parents use the generic answer "Because I said so" to an overly-curious child who won't stop asking why. It's a give up answer but at times the right one.
So why should you go out and do things you know in your heart are good for you and society as a whole?
Because I said so. :-)
Have a great week!
Factoid that makes Captcha less annoying and even interesting..
July 10, 2015
I learned today that when you have to enter those annoying Captcha words to submit forms on web sites you are actually deciphering words in digitized copies of books that computers can't figure out.
Old books are difficult for computers to read because well, they're old. The print is too faded. But humans CAN read them. So when a Captcha comes up, it's just a pic of a word the computer can't figure out. When YOU figure it out it goes back and updates the answer from the source book and moves on to the next word.
Cool, huh? Good job! Pat yourself on the back.
#BLOG Hey, wait. This relationship already happened. A story about how history repeats itself.
June 15, 2015
So I was just going about my day today minding my own business, getting some work done, having a relatively nice day when it hit me.
A relationship scenario that's happening now with a beautiful woman (who shall remain nameless) ALSO happened to me 21 years ago! In an almost identical fashion. It's amazing how life repeats itself.
So do you want the sordid details? Of course you do!
So 21 years ago I was basically the same dude I am NOW except I was 28 instead of 49. haha. That's not really true because I'm wiser now and I have the gray to prove it. Well, at least I think I'm wiser. Maybe I'm not. In any case, way back then I LOVED titty bars. I was lucky (or cursed) enough to be making loads of cash back then and I just didn't see anything wrong with spending said disposable income on women who enjoyed dancing with little to no clothes on. I was young.
Anyway.
One evening at a club I met a young lady by the name of Kylee. Kylee was cool. I always hit it off with strippers because I'm funny and I smile a lot. (ALL women like that, btw). Kylee liked my sense of humor more than most and actually had a good one herself. Most men (especially if you're a strip club newbie) have this delusion that they can see girls outside of the club. I allowed this delusion to enter my mind with Kylee because while most of the time I'd say I'm not like "most men", many times I'm JUST like them. To my amazement Kylee actually said she wouldn't mind if I wanted to do something outside of the club.
So I followed up later and called her and arranged a date.
She wanted to see some Jean Claude Van Damme action flick I wasn't the least bit interested in seeing but that didn't matter at all because I wanted to do ANYTHING with her. Because she was hot. I was shallow like that. Yes, she was funny, too, but did I mention she was hot?
The date went well but here's where the story gets sad if you're a dude. Somewhere along the line she friend zoned me. I don't know exactly how it happened but it happened and once it does you're pretty much powerless to overcome it and you have two choices. You can either cut the girl off entirely or just accept it and be her friend. I usually decide on option 2 because hot girls come with hot girlfriends and not EVERY girl is going to friend zone you (unless you're me. lol.)
Anywaaaay..
Life goes on and Kylee and I are "just friends" but we still have good times together because we get to know each other well and we just LOVE cutting up pretty much ALL the time. We go out of our way to make each other laugh. She goes through episodes with men that usually end bad and I'm there to comfort her and tell her they suck, blah, blah.. girl/guy friend stuff.
But then something amazing happened. Or someONE amazing happened I guess I should say.
Katie.
When I found Katie I was done with Kylee. Because not only was Katie just as funny if not funnier than Kylee, she was way smarter, thought I was the funniest guy she'd ever met, and definitely did NOT want me as "just a friend." Katie was "the one." Suddenly the fact that I could never be anything more than Kylee's friend didn't matter anymore.
But whereas one might think this is where the Kylee story comes to a logical end, one would be mistaken.
About a month or so after I met Katie and we were in the middle of our whirlwind storybook romance I received a call out of the blue from Kylee. She said she missed me and made an interesting proclamation. She said "I've decided we can be more than friends."
I was like "Whaaaat?!?!" I guess she finally realized that I might make a pretty nice boyfriend after all. Well, DUH! I was like "Oh, man, Kylee, I'm sorry but it's too late." I was completely committed to Katie and there was no way in hell I was gonna jeopardize that by even THINKING about dating Kylee at the same time. Plus I didn't want to. I wanted to spend all my free time with Katie.
Cut to today and I've recently had another Kylee in my life. Another extremely hot funny woman with whom I built a cool friendship because she gave me no other choice. Friends or nothing so I chose friends. The similarities to the relationship I had with Kylee lo those many years ago are undeniable. Well at least they are in my head. ha.
Nowadays "new Kylee" doesn't even have time to be friends anymore because she's head over heels in love with a new man. And she especially doesn't have time to be friends with a dude who has never been afraid to make it clear he has always wanted more than just a friendship. 21 years ago I was basically a child and afraid to tell women how I really felt about them. These days I go out of my way to tell people how I feel about them because nothing bad ever happens if you tell someone you love them.
I'm not concerned about new Kylee and whether or not she still wants to be friends, blah, blah, blah, because she's beyond happy with her new man and if history repeats itself and the story goes the same way the old Kylee story went I should be meeting another Katie soon. How wonderful will THAT be?!?
OMG, I TOTALLY LOVE YOU, new Katie! ... err um, it's too early in our not even a relationship yet to say that isn't it? Oh well. :-D
#blog The @Kia #Optima rocks!
April 15, 2015
Drove the Kia Optima the last couple days and what a great ride! There's a lot of little things that bug me about cars. For example, if the gas intake is on the passenger's side. Why? Or if it's difficult to find the button to open the gas cap. Again. Wtf? (Apparently much of my frustration involves the gas situation. Lol.)
Anyway, here's a list of other things I really enjoyed about this car:
1. Color. Listed as red but it was like a burgundy. I like any car color that makes me think of Ron Burgundy.
2. The ride. Smooth. I was a little tired during one longer stretch down the highway and I almost fell asleep at the wheel. That's how you know the ride is smooth. I would even go as far to say it beats the Camry in that category and that's saying something.
3. Easily accessible USB ports. This is another thing that annoys me about other vehicles I've driven. They put the USB ports in weird places that are difficult to see or reach. Why? The Optima's ports are right there in front of you and easy to find like they should be.
4. The word "auto" on the lights section of the turn signal. There are actually two things I like about this. The fact that control of the lights is on the turn signal where they should be and that it's easy to identify the setting where you can set it and leave it.
The Optima is up there on my list when I finally decide to be a car owner again. The only thing I would change about it would be to upgrade to leather seats.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
Have a great day!
(Nick Druga doesn't currently own a car so please keep this in mind when assessing the viewpoints above. He does, however, know how to drive but can no longer do so without the use of glasses. He has also driven a number of different vehicles in the past with varying levels of enjoyment.)
Seeking career woman to fiercely love and support
April 2, 2015
There's a successful career woman out there who would love to have a man help take her career to the next level by doing all that computer and social media stuff that's not her strong suit but she knows she needs to be doing.
She would also like for him to provide her with loyalty, love and support, take care of her emotional and physical needs, and make her laugh. If he cooked a nice dinner now and again that would be pretty sweet too. Just someone to come home to after hard days at work whom she can count on would be so wonderful.
She would also like for him to provide her with loyalty, love and support, take care of her emotional and physical needs, and make her laugh. If he cooked a nice dinner now and again that would be pretty sweet too. Just someone to come home to after hard days at work whom she can count on would be so wonderful.
Well look no further lovely lady because you've found your man. It's me! I possess all those qualities and more! I'm even easy on the eyes. We should totally get together like yesterday!
My only requirement from YOU is that you love and appreciate me. I don't think that's too much to ask, do you? Oh and maybe go to the gym with me now and again because we gotta stay in shape.
Peace and Joy to all,
-Nick